Dare to Dream

YOU ALWAYS COME FIRST

If you ask me what breaks my heart, I would have to say it is the same problem broken down in two parts:

a) A woman who ends up giving away so much of herself, taking care of everyone else first, to such a degree that she neglects herself

b) A woman who in the quest of loving those dearest to her, compromises and sacrifices to such a point that she loses part of herself.

Both scenarios are part of the same problem.

anaisninWomen grow up with the belief that they must embody the impossible ideal of “the perfect woman” “the perfect mother” “the perfect wife”, or “the perfect daughter.”  They are raised with the concept that whatever role they assume, they need to be perfect at it, and to do that, they need to put everyone else’s needs and desires before their own.

The problem is that years later, that same woman will wake up one day and realize that she can not even recognize the woman looking back at her.  “Where is the woman I used to be?” she may ask herself. “What happened to me?” “Where did I go wrong?” “When did I lose my confidence and my fearlessness, my drive and my strength?”

Unfortunately some women may realize what has happened, but only when it is too late.

The wake up call may take many different forms, the result is very often the same. These women find themselves on their own, without a penny to their name, and perhaps two or three children in tow (I bet if you are sincere you have seen or heard this scenario a countless number of times)

I hope this article stirs something in you that allows you to wake up before it is too late, before you reach that point in which the wake-up call is that dramatic and life- changing.

We have to stop feeling guilty for putting ourselves first, for going after our dreams, for wanting more, for wanting something different, for daring to dream.  There is nothing to feel guilty about. Dare to Dream.

You are important, you have one life and you need to live it fully.

I know that when you were growing up you probably heard a message like: “Life is not only about you.  Who do you think you are?”  Well, I am here to tell you that it is about you, and it always has been!   And when you decide to make it about you, that is when you will truly become fulfilled, free, healthy, and wealthy, inside and out.

You will be filling your soul with what you LOVE to do.  And because of that great fulfillment, you will be able to give freely to others: to help more, to love more, and to be there in a more meaningful way for others too.

As women, we have to stop believing this fairy-tale that letting someone else be in charge of our lives is okay or safe.  This fairy-tale that tells us either directly or subliminally that our only job is to be “the perfect woman”  in order to serve everyone else, and that if we do so, everything will be okay.

I am here to tell you otherwise.

  • There is nothing on this earth more important than taking care of your needs and taking care of yourself, simply because You can not give what you don’t have.
  • There is nothing wrong with dreaming about a better life, more freedom, more money, more time for yourself, more time to exercise, more time to be alone, more time to pamper yourself.  You need to fill your bucket first before you can help others do the same. Dare to dream, dare to dream big!

As women, life originates from us, in our wombs.   We need to remind ourselves how powerful and strong we are, and stop being afraid to step into that power.  Remember, we are here to lead others to greatness, but to do that, we need to first start with leading our own lives.  

“Woman, you choose,

and continue to choose

to be who you are.

You came here to thrive.

The odds are steep,

but you need to know that

the game is rigged in your favor.

You know what you are doing.

See that your demons aren’t real,

and although fear is part of the deal,

love is all you need,

and love starts from within.

Remember, you are never alone”

 

Just take the first step.  For you, that might be taking a 15-minute nap because you are so tired.  For someone else, that might be saying no to something you truly do not want to do.  For another individual, it might simply be buying a book and scheduling time to actually read it in silence, maybe hiring your first mentor.   Then again it might just be a question of getting out of the house and letting some people come in to help you take care of things for a while.  Whatever that first step is for you, just take it.

You are worth it!

With all my love and appreciation.

From the soul of one woman to another.

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